After spending my teenage years working in a tanning salon, I understand the dangers of sunbeds more than most.
However, my natural skin shade is blue, so fake tan has become a necessity in my life.
I’ve tried most brands, within differing price ranges, and although I’ve never been happy with any of them, I have been satisfied.
I’ve been using St Tropez mousse recently and it gives a nice even coverage, although doesn’t fade quite so evenly.
Now for my rant.
I went to House of Fraser in Richmond a few weeks ago to replace my St Tropez and was told rather helpfully they didn’t stock it.
No Fake Bake either, which was my second option. But wait, the guy at Lancome insists they sell THE best fake tan ever – Lancôme Flash Bronzer cue his sales pitch.
The culprit
Gorgeous “creamy” colour, no smell, no streaks, he uses it all the time (he was the palest Scotsman I’d ever come across). I was taken in as I always am and shelled out the £18 or whatever it was for the 125ml tube.
Now I know how to fake tan, believe me. I know to exfoliate, to moisturise, to spread it on thinly, to use a tanning mitt, yada yada. Trust me, I know.
I also know this product is USELESS. Reviews online call it a best seller and worship the ground it walks on, but it is a pile of pants. Here is the honest truth…
It is an awful shade, really orangey. Not at all natural.
You can’t see it going on so you streak very badly.
Your hands will look ridiculous when you’re finished.
After 3 showers (2 with a scrubbing brush), I could still smell it seeping from my pores, as could my fiancé who refused to come near me.
I’ve tried it twice since and the same thing has happened both times time without fail.
I will never re-buy this product. Ever.
As a result of using it, I can also tell you that nail varnish remover, make up wipes, baby oil, bicarbonate of soda and exfoliating does not get rid of a bad case of fake tan.
You’ve just got run the course, only come out at night, or wear long sleeves in the sun.
I’d give it a 1/10 purely because it smells nice when you begin putting it on. That’s it, the only plus.
Make-up counter staff, bloggers, website review writers…do us all a favour and hit us with some honesty?! I’m sick and tired or buying overpriced fake tan miracle products that end up sitting in my cupboard because they make me look like a jaundiced orangatan.
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